I have been thinking a lot about shame recently. Not just my own. But our collective human shame. And what impact it has on today’s current events. On who we are evolving or devolving into as a people.
How we are all hiding things we feel guilt and shame about. We are all teetering on the edge of a personal meltdown at certain points in our life. Each of us has our own collection of baggage we are not proud of. We all have things we want to forget, stuff away, pretend we didn’t do.
Every single one of us.
We are all so busy hiding and burying and covering it up. Shaping and spackling and painting on this facade of perfection. We keep ourselves protected, hidden away under these layers of fake. Masks to keep us concealed so no one sees us.
But when we conceal those parts of us. When we deny their existence we also deny ourselves vulnerability to connect with other humans on an authentic level. We exhaust ourselves in the very drama of maintaining pretense. We are further disgusted with our secreted selves and because we burrow those things deep down and away we do not bring them to light for examination and change. We continue the cycle. Alone. That submersion of ourselves in shame and solitude is destructive. It eats away at our souls and then pervades into every aspect of our lives like a super mold. It will coat everything if you allow it.
The quote comes to mind “You’re only as sick as your secrets.”
How can we find the courage to blossom into our full potential when we are so busy suppressing? When we are unwilling to acknowledge its existence?
Personally, I don’t believe that is possible.
So much of my personal adventure has been in the understanding. Bone deep comprehension that I truly am not alone.
I am unique in certain respects, but not really. I am at my core another human. That’s it. Trying to live my best life, openly. I have wounds and triggers. But I also have hope. My hope is directly tied to my willingness to see who all of me is right now and who all of you are. And to try to love us in spite of the “flaws” the “imperfections” or perhaps because of those attributes. And stay rooted in sharing with the world my real me.
I have really enjoyed learning more about shame and connection and vulnerability through the books and teachings of Brene Brown. My learning continues and is an adventure all its own.
What do you think about shame? Is it a societal epidemic?